I think a lot of people outside of the United States would describe Americans as an angry bunch. I only partly agree.
Americans deal in outrage. We get angry, we don’t stay angry. Some are too scared, others too content. American citizens, digitally and in the physical realm, do lynchings. We jump people, mob, paint the town red one drunken night, hunt down the villain of Monday’s viral story and ruin their life by Tuesday.
But we don’t do trenches. We don’t do sieges. Not many of us have beliefs we would actually die for.
We do flare-ups. We do sensationalism. We react. We love our buttons pushed.
(Yeah, that one right there. That’s it. Don’t stop. Ahhhh. Alright, same time next week?)
We do not like to remind ourselves the thing that pissed us off last year never actually ended. But we moved on. We can’t pay attention long enough to stay angry.
But I can.
The US National Guard occupied residential areas in Minneapolis starting April 12, 2021 in response to protests for the police killing of Daunte Wright. They were a presence (3,300 strong at their peak) all the way through the Derek Chauvin trial verdict the week of April 19, 2021. I’ve never seen more guns in North Minneapolis than that week. I’ve never felt more on edge. I never felt more Afghan. And Filipino. And Haitian.




We weren’t occupied by a foreign enemy. We were invaded by our own troops. Minneapolitans simply out past government-mandated curfew were arrested. People standing on their own porches were shot at by their own troops. I’m still mad.
Outrage is a fit, an episode, a moment. Anger — opposition to something or someone you feel has wronged you — requires a real resolution. Minneapolis still hasn’t gotten one since police in Minnesota killed George. Or Daunte. Or Amir.
Since November 2020, at least 300,000 Tegaru (Tigrayan) civilians in North Ethiopia were killed. Some from starvation forced by the federal government, others from a lack of health care … caused by the federal government. And of course, many were killed by the allied forces of the Ethiopian army (using Emirati drones), Eritrean army, and Fano, an ethnic militia of Amhara nationalists.
I only learned this year that I had a relative escape the Eritrean army, defying the order to essentially kill their brothers and sisters in the name of a vindictive dictator on par with Kim Jong un.
Most of Tigray, a region of about 5 million people (closer to 6 million before the genocide), still can’t eat. Imagine most of Minnesota just not having food. What the fuck? What the actual fuck. An African government is doing this to its own people. An African government is inviting outsiders to do this to its own people. But it’s an African government and African people. They shrugged and moved on. I burned. I still burn. I have not moved on.
No one talks about what happened and continues to happen in the birthplace of humanity. The birthplace of my parents. A historically free Black country. I’m mad. I will continue to be mad.
Don’t get me started on COVID. Or the country’s air quality. Israel-Palestine. Ye. Gun control. Really, please.
***
My spirit is at war. So now I yell on tracks. No, I’m probably not going to freak out on you in real life. I’m a man, I have composure and shit to lose. But fuck you.
Fuck your ears.
Fuck your wishes for my music.
I’m not an entertainer, I’m just entertaining.
Outrage is a geyser. Outrage is narrow, white-hot, quick, and predictable. But if you’re an American who’s *mad* like me, you are Mount St. Helens. You are Mount Edgecumbe. You are the super volcano under Yellowstone National Park. It goes unnoticed, but it’s happening. Deep, deep down. You just haven’t erupted yet. And when you do?
Hopefully there is an in-between for my compatriots. Maybe Kilauea. Fire steadily flowing, pushing against a cold ocean. Lava hardens to become new land and new lava flows over it, hardening, your truth slowly becoming a new world the ocean can’t drown. And cooled lava erodes to become soil, and the grave of your anger becomes a cradle for new life.
Every nigga is a star. People forget to say stars shine because they burn. The “heavens” are powered by hellfire. Rappers, scholars, politicians, “activists,” no. They’re not burning like me. But I need them to. I need you to, at some point.
Stream “Mad Enough” by Zander, an American wherever you get your music from on the internet. Watch “Mad Enough” the music video on the ATC Sound YouTube channel.
UPDATE 10/7/2024: Edited formatting of links to “Mad Enough” and to reflect Daunte Wright was not killed by MPD specifically